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How do I get his name off my mortgage?

by Terry
(Denver, Colorado)

My boyfriend and I bought a home together and we later had children. So we are both on the mortgage.

We had problems and split up and he moved out. We were on some what of speaking terms till I filed for child support.

So he quit his job so I would not get the child support and now my hours are going to be cut next month at work.

I wanted to see if I could refinance my home but I can't because he refuses to sign or help me out. I told him that not only my credit would be affected but his would as well and he told me he could care less.

I am current with my mortgage and don't want to fall behind. I don't want to lose my home.

Is there any way I could get his name off my mortgage so I could see if I could refinance on my own? Is that an option?

My mortgage company told me that right now being that he won't sign there is nothing I could do.

=====ANSWERS=====

Hello Terry,

Thank you for asking questions here at my blog. I will do my best in sharing with you what I know about situations like what you find yourself in.

First of all, it saddens me to hear your boyfriend is not man enough to live up to his responsibilities. This is especially hard when there are children involved.

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SIDE NOTE: Read These Posts

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The fact that he is on the mortgage with you does indeed make for a very tough situation. He must be willing to sign off on the deed in order for you to refinance or sell the house.

Without his help on that end of the paperwork, you will find yourself in a very difficult ordeal.

You may have to find some legal help on that because you cannot do a thing without his cooperation.

Chances are you will have to come to some kind of a legal agreement to sell the house or you may have to buy out his interest in order to get him to sign off on the deed and mortgage.

What you are dealing with is not much different than what happens to married people who divorce.
In a divorce, one or the other parties sign off on the deed and the other party continues to make the payments after a settlement.

In regards to the mortgage, the lender does not care if you stay together or not, any parties to the contract will be held liable until the house sells, is refinanced or paid off. That is the only way to get a release of mortgage. So even in a divorce, the partner who signs off on the deed is at risk on the mortgage.

In most cases a certain time period is decided on in the beginning how long the mate who stays in the house has to sell the house or get it refinanced. Perhaps a year or two, but something is normally put into the divorce decree.

I know this to be the case because my first wife left me and I had to buy out her interest in the house within 12 months. We had a child together and she moved elsewhere.

I certainly hope you can get your situation worked out. Seek legal help my friend. Also, if you have a rich uncle perhaps he can buy the house and then your boyfriend will sign off if there is some money in it for him.

But as I think about it, with the current real estate market like it is, unless you have a lot of equity you may be under water on your mortgage and you will end up moving anyway.

I wish you the best.

Kind Regards,

Jeffrey Ragan

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